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The Shopping Complex by Purdeep Singh (5)
"OMG!! this was flippin hillarious!! u got a gift geeza. Ur such a gud writer. I imagined everything you wrote. Could not stop laughing." -- Ryan.
"oH mY GaW, funny Stawee, Goo Stawee, i giv u thoo dalla!! i like Tina Thunna, i hav fun, witer is funny witer, is good. i enjoy, i'm gawin thoo shoppin complex in bejing thoo nite!! as Thina Thunna!!" -- Pingu Ming Mau, BRISTOL, uk.
"Vah Vah!!! (Clap Clap!!) Kya Baath Hein (Eyebrows go up n down), I have just read this whilst im in a backstreet computer cafe, i am wearing a silky saree, and my bangles r chanakna against the keyboard as i type, this author is rather zabardast!! I'm liking the story!! If Purdeep is single i would liked to giv him a belly dance!!" -- Yoonik, Dehli, India.
"I LURVED THIS STORY!!! Its was Fabulous, the tears were pouring down my face!! i laffed that much! Oh it was GREAAT!! Oh Me wee Glasgow Accent, it was Great Great!" -- SHABBAZ, GLASGOW.
"Amazing...I loved it so much...Especially the part were they are applying makeup on each other before they make the desent into the unknown...hahaha....it waz a treat to read..Luv U...Samantha, Four Oaks, Sutton Coldfield.." -- Samantha, West Midlands, England.


The Ebanese Pit by Sf (4)
"This was a good story, and had a really good plot! It could've used a bit more character development, and more descriptions though. Good job!" -- ME, meme, me, mememe.
"I really liked this one. It kept me wanting to read until I was finished. Keep up the good work." -- lrb.
"Great story, I really liked this one" -- kendall.
"I love reading " -- Crystal Baldeo, Port of Spain, Caroni, Trinidad.


My Alienated Life by Kiara Avalon (2)
"go froggy, clever piece." -- curious.
"Sounds like what happens when you move to Australia. ;)" -- thePratmeister, Adelaide, SA, Australia.


Where Are You Going? by Sharada Arun (10)
"Excellent! keep writing" -- Sheela, dallas, TX, usa.
"Good job ! Keep it up !" -- Ashwini, San Antonio, TX USA.
"Great !! Keep it up " -- Sapna, Bangalore, Karnataka, India.
"very touching story. however the end needs a better presentation.whose was the strong voice?etc by the way i am 16(so no need to take my comments seriously) and actually dream of becoming a softfare engineer one day. " -- Upasana Datta, ranchi, jharkhand, india.
"Powerful ending makes the previous seemingly slow-paced & over-detailed conversations thought-provoking and tear-triggering... I can't wait to read your next writing, which hopefully will give us another surprising ending? " -- Eddie, Acton, MA, U.S.A..
"Intelligent and thought provoking story, keep writing" -- Tim, Lowell, MA, USA.
"You are a great story teller! Please keep writing.'Where Are You Going' makes me want to read more of your writing and to read more about Kashmir, Rajasthan and life in that part of the world. It is hard to write dialog but you seem to do it easily. I enjoyed learning about Ram's life and think perhaps I would have enjoyed learning more of Faisel's life. Let me know when you've written something else. I'll want to read it!" -- Carla, Brighton, MA, USA.
"Surprise Ending. Very Good Job. Keep writing. " -- Veni, Burlington, MA, USA.
"I really enjoyed your story, Sharada. Even though I could see where you were taking this story, I was eager to learn how you were going to get there. I was not disappointed. But I will comment that the omnicient voice at the end is a bit weak. Perhaps you could lead into the voice a little more - perhaps there was a voice all along that neither character was listening to, or another device you could use to reach a tighter ending. The story of Ram is absolutely enthralling, however. I am eager to read more about Ram. Have you considered writing a novel about Ram? Ram, before his death, however. This character and his family are very interesting. The relationship between Ram and Uma is so loving and tender. I am eager to learn about the relationship between Ram and his other sister and brother. I also love your ability to get right into the story - you don't play around with the words, I like that. From someone who is a big fan of world literature, especially lit from Asia and the Middle East - give me more Ram, and you've got yourself a fan for life. Great effort, Sharada! " -- Eiyana, Baltimore, MD, USA.
"Captivating story.Keep writing." -- Vasudha, Newton, MA, USA.


Tiny Tale by Tamsin Butler (1)
"Nice idea but think it may need a bit of a review to make it make better sense :)" -- Tasha Jones.


Welcome To Reality by Judy K Cox (1)
"I think that yes." -- claudia regina, rio de janeiro, RJ, Brasil.


Virgil's Inferno by Kain (1)
"Very unique and interesting, enjoyed it all.." -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


To Blast A Hole... For Nuts by OverYouT (1)
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.............Thanks Talim, your a genius, you always get me with "followed by an apple"" -- kwilt.


Tiny Dancer by Lawson (1)
"Excellent Story, happy to read it, keep it up. " -- Sharada, arlington, MA, USA.


The Girl Without A Soul by Hannah Brumfield (2)
"Pretty good. I like the flow of the whole story. I would suggest adding more detail and turn it into a novel. Otherwise, pretty good." -- Sean.
"I saw the reveiw of the story and I think that it's a great story I know so and I really like clonning books lately..." -- crestie, london, ontario, canada.


The Family Gathering by Hanna Rose Ashton-Lawson (2)
"well hanna you did ok with this piece but i think i would change a few things like for one instead of saying you wrote it maybe you should my name next to auther i think it would work alot better, anyway apart fromt that it is such a good story i really got a grasp of you family and how they are nutters, like you i supose" -- Ericah.
"This story made me laugh so hard, seriosly your family seems really funny. you should be a published author!" -- Erin.


The Exit Sign... A Lot Like Bob by OverYouT (4)
"hey, my titles got deleted too. i wonder what's going on" -- chad naquin.
"I have become a big fan of your stuff Talim, too bad those others were deleted, they were classics" -- kwilt.
"Thanks Kwilt, yeah, i dont know why things are being deleted, but i'll try reputting my other ones back on." -- Talim.
"These naughty teenies are ready to go all the way when stimulated a bit with some easy cash, gay teenagers having sex galleries hall of fame. So, watch them getting really nasty while taking double loads after having their tight pussies stretched wide open - free videos of gay teenagers having sex, funny, video post. Which one of these young insatiable sluts will be the dirtiest? free young sex websites" -- Tony, Jamestown, NC, BRAZIL.


The Campestris by Nad Anonymous Dark (2)
"A lovely little story about nature and it habitants. The first paragh written beautifully that l wanted the rest that followed. And about survial too, how any mother will go out to search to feed the hungry mouths. Ithink that it was really good and l enjoyed it. " -- Amy, Hayes, UK.
"This story was very detailed and entertaining. I was intrested in the details and the lives of desert inhabitants. Keep writing." -- Joe Albrecht, N.Y., U.S..


The Burning Cottage by MurryT (1)
"Very original.. Your talented.. Stay happy and write write write.." -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


The Average Guy by Benjamin Crump (4)
"Great story, Ben!" -- GraceS.
"Nice job, Ben! I'd like to hear what he had to go through with those dogs to earn the $2,000. What kind of mud puddles did he have to get them out from? I bet he had quite the adventure. :-)" -- Jonathan H..
"Great job, Ben! " -- Kari F.
"That's a great story, Ben. Great writing, I really like it!!!" -- MadelineR.


Sushi's Day Off by Kain (3)
"Wait a second, hey what the hell is this. Not at all your usual calliber or style. Ebert gives it one thumb down, one up his ass. I should have headed the warning. You write so much better than this. I'm talking to you like a life long buddy here, not trying to put you down" -- kwilt.
"hehehe. Yea. It's awful. But I have about 12 other short stories that I'm stuck on and I felt like I had to post something. So I posted this crappy story. Thanks for the constructive criticism and in the future, I will try to keep my crappy stories to myself." -- Kain.
"In the big picture it wasn't that bad compared to others I have read on this site.........But I dig your style and this just wasn't it. Can't wait to read the new stories your working on" -- kwilt.


Son Of A Demon by Galvin Faulks (5)
"my little sister can write better than you" -- bob.
"Great story,very creative,I'm waiting for your next story." -- BJ, suffolk, VA, U.S.A..
"Great mind,I love it. Your hot with your words." -- James White, New York,, NY, U.S.A..
"To be brutally honest, This is half-assed writing. The theme is totally copycat from a conglomeration of B occult movies, comic book fantasies, and corny re-hashed demonic rituals. Nothing original, nothing new, just the same old, same old stuff. What you have attempted to write is ordinary trash that just about everyone has seen or read before. Even 14 year-olds would find it boring. Yawn! C'mon, you can do better than this. Or can you?" -- Richard.
"very cool dude, read this story awhile ago still awaiting something new." -- bryan jones, newark, new jersey, usa.


Rock And Rose by Andrews (2)
"Beautifully written, such a romantic feel about it. I loved it." -- Bella.
"Honest writing, completly true." -- Emma.


My Granny by Innovant Deis (1)
"It is wonderful" -- rerer, jil, new york, usa.


Midnight Express by Tay Angela (1)
"Great job keep up the fine writing! Yours was really cool..." -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


Look Beyond The Surface by Matt D Schumacker (2)
"Matt your story is amazing! Congrats on making it on the web page. " -- Tessa, St. Louis, Missouri, United States.
"very good" -- ionut.


Janet, My Father, And The Lampshade by OverYouT (2)
"So sincere.....Are you into the Dresden Dolls? If not you could be because you really got a good thing going with the coin-operated moose fucking and squirrel nutting stuff. I love it, may I have some more please?" -- kwilt.
"haha, thanks! yeah, acctually, i think the song Coin-operated boy happen to be passing through my head as i was writing this. " -- Talim.


I Pledge Allgiance by Elizabeth K Flannery (1)
"AHH Liz I love your story! College School kids stories ROCK! lol im such a weird girl! much love! -Tess" -- Tessa, St. Louis, Missouri.


Fucking A Squirrel by OverYouT (3)
"Both so very funny and totally insane.....I hurt myself laughing " -- kwilt.
"haha, thats what i like to hear! thanks" -- Talim.
"the moose got kicked to the curb, oh big you think and too big to kick or even fit nicely at the curb, wrong again, you lose, in fact moose has been losing his whole life. Just another "L" in the bracket that's seems to be winning�. And as soon as moose and squirrel fuck each other moose will never know the branches, limbls, leaves, turns, bark, holes the squirrel knows. Where is the love, where the perma-grin car dodging tree climbing stud dweels,, well shoot, you shot yourself again�. Moose in the hair, Moose in the dish at the moose lodge but not there where he knows never again and that alone killed the moose." -- Hoof Harted, Temecula, CA, United States.


For Richey by Tessak O'neill (1)
"I really like your story.. much more serious than mine! Anyway, good job! " -- Liz.


A New Discovery by Kari Fontenault (2)
"This is a fun fan fiction story, Kari! I really like Star Gate SG1 too. I can tell you had a lot of fun writing this! Good job." -- A Reader Passing By.
"I really enjoyed your writing style, Kari! I especially liked how well you described everything." -- GraceS.


A Little Piece Of Heaven by Lew Dallas (2)
"I enjoyed the discriptive words to paint a picture of Addie and where she lived. I felt like I shared the boat ride on a peaceful river and came back refreshed. I hope to read more from this author's works in the future." -- Nancy Rider.
"Very good. Written from the heart. You convey a mood, a place, and details of observation that capture the experience as in a Grant Wood painting. I would like to visit Addie's place and fortunately you have preserved it. " -- Glendora Rider.


The True Story Of The Little Red Riding Hood by Nicolette Cone (3)
"Excellent Story! I enjoyed reading it." -- Arun, Boston, MA, USA.
"this was really good..i loved the idea. you should have gone further." -- priya, syd, australia, nsw.
"Wow..that was a really good story." -- Jordan.


Where The Soul Ends And New Beginnings by Andrews (3)
"Wonderful read, really captivating, I really felt for it. " -- Bella.
"I loved it, its deep and conscise but powerful and strong all at the same time." -- Emma.
"sure" -- sure.


When Night Falls by Meghan L Bell (1)
"goodness i like your use of vivid phrases!all the best in your other stories!" -- shiny, singapore.


Weak Emotion by ColliarAM (2)
"Nice - some PROSE on this website at last. But it smacks to me as a reporting of a real life happening. Did this really happen? If not then it kinda smacks of wishful thinking. But I like the pace. More description of your emotional state would be good; Incredibly - writers tip - you can express how you feel internally by describing objects and situations outside of your self. I know, I know, -FUCK ME!-. But that's what I think." -- the rube.
"cool work .enough thought provoking to inspire people.keep it up" -- yudi, noidea, india.


Walking With Jesus by Sarah K Lewry (6)
"being a christian myself,i am very touched by your story.may more people come to know of the father's plan for them through your story!" -- shiny, singapore.
"Dude, Meet me in Montana. Your pal always," -- Jesus Christ 182.
"I really liked your story. I know that if I wasn't already a christian, I probably would be after I read this." -- Sean.
"It's lovely to be encouraged afresh this morning, thankyou." -- ann.
"This is great. I love Jesus" -- J Harris.
"What a beautiful way to spread the word of the Lord. I love the end bit about the promise. Believe you me, the Lord keeps his promises. Amy" -- Amy, London, London.


Time Factor by Joe Dan Campbell (1)
"This story was horrible, there was no point and no grammar at all. This story was basically pointless, if your going to publish something make sure you can atleast spell things right!!! " -- Lori, Lawton , MI , USA .


The World Is A Sand Castle by Tom M Fisher (1)
"Wow.What a thought provoking piece! I love the way it has the song theme running throughout it....amazing!" -- Briony Carvalho.


The Temptation by Kristen Karlson (4)
"Kristen i like the deceptiveness of it, i throughly though it another romance tale at the beginning. A nicely written piece, i like it. Peace." -- Hugh.
"It was great, i admire your wide vocabulary.Your writing style is somewhat similar to my own.I'm new to this site,and just completed a story of my own,it's called Son of a Demon.Check it out under new entries and give me your feedback on the entry. You can e-mail me at gee_baby_757. " -- Galvin Faulks, Suffolk, Virginia, United states.
"I think this is the most wonderful piece of writing I have ever read in my life! You are a true genius! I love the way you have constructed the intense feeling of suspense, and I like the way you have jumped from the present time to earlier in the night without any warning! It threw me at first, but is very cleverly done! Ali and I are so proud of you! xoxoxoxox" -- Your beautiful sister, Edinburgh, Scotland.
"thanks heaps Nik! that means alot! i'll email you the other parts, though they are really long and not finished yet. xoxoxo" -- kristen.


The Sketchbook by Angela L (1)
"Aaaaawwwwwwww!" -- kwilt.


The Key Maker by J Steven (2)
"This story, i thought, was quit interesting, however I did hope it would end better." -- Dillon.
"The story has a good basis and I am not a critic so don't take this as criticism because the only true critic of YOUR work is YOU. Just a few things you might consider. Make your character more three dimensional. How old is He? Has he always been in the Key business? Wouldn't he have enough pride to call himself a Key Smith? He visited his wife at the cemetery. How did she die, how long has this ritual been going on? Did he go home after the visit? or did he skip breakfast before going to the Cemetery? The Key...these two statements are two lines apart 'some kind of pull' two line later... 'a strong connection to it, a strange pull.' What was the pull...spiritual/religious? Your character works with keys day after day. Tell me why he feels so strongly about the key... The trash was full...wouldn't it also be a ritual to take out the trash? From what you described he seems detail orientated. If so let us readers know. THE BACK DOOR: He is a Key Smith...was the back door broken and he neglected to fix it? (Hey we are all human, we all procrastinate) It just brings validity to the story. What happened to the trash bag? Did he leave the store to empty the trash and return before locking up or was he heading for the front door with the trash bag in hand when he heard the knock? Was the main character at the door when he saw the man with the mask? (The clown mask is a good touch it adds a but of eeriness to the story.) The key at the back door. The character was panicked he reached into his pocket and tried the key out of desperation. DROP the line... 'I did not know how or why this idea came to be' Would the character really take time to close the door if he was running away? 'closing the door behind me. I ran and ran. 'Then I bumped into a police officer' Did the character run around a corner colliding with him or just closed his eyes and run straight for him? It was familiar (or) He looked familiar...? 'it was familiar...' Over all the story was Good...it is the little things that make it Great! Keep writing you have a good imagination..I hope to see you out signing books one day. A fan, P. T. Izyk Author of 'The Key Maker' (Short stories by) 'The Cost of Fame' (Short Stories by) " -- P. T. Izyk, Dallas, TX, USA.


The Indian Rope Trick by Nyman Perkins (1)
"I enjoyed the story. I knew how it was done. But that's another story. Suggest a further edit. Condiser the 'hook' for the story.It is an important aspect. I looked a little way down your work and found this: �Certainly not! I said I would prove he is a fraud and I shall. A gentleman never goes back on his word, Garth.� It is a good place to start our story. Then follow on with your explaination. Add more feeling into the plot; make the reader imagine they are actually there. Thank you for the mention of Diamond harbour;memories there." -- Cleveland W. Gibson, England.


The Dream World by Sf (5)
"Craaaaaasssshhh!" -- kwilt.
""craaaaaasssshhh!" -- kwilt; WOW! That was freakishly awesome! Watche for the sentence that could've been split into like five or six sentences though! If I see another sentence that long, I will be the one the gun in the store. And you will be running into a window in your pajamas! And, I am going to go Begin to become interested in something else!" -- haha hahahaha, hahaha, hahaha, hahaha.
"Pretty good. Maybe a little better character description but all and all very nice." -- lrb.
"C'mon guy, don't give up on writing theres not much else to get into these days. I mean there is crime and drugs but how fun could that be? See I don't know anything about sentences and spelling and what not. This kid Sam, he was just dreaming and someone killed him while he was sleepwalking....makes me feel like awwww stupid kid. Truely Tales from the Crypt style but someone with such bold ideas should be shooting for a more of a devils rejects theme. With zombies stlye he could get away with anything and it still maintains some rudimentary entertainment value. Hey, I love a good crash buddy. Please don't think I was busting on your story." -- kwilt.
"Wow was Sam dreaming or was he sleep walking great story." -- J.


Taking Out The Trash by Sarah K Lewry (2)
"Very good and inspirational. Loved it. I too am a Christian and just published one of my short stories. your story reminded me about it. Its called a girl without a soul. If you want to please read it. keep writing. Youve got real talent." -- hannah.
"Wow this was beatiful written." -- Jeanette .


See Dick . . . Less by J Rychwa (4)
"I love how you write. In the end though I was so horrified with the graphic mutilation I couldn't help wondering if you haven't written a nice romantic comedy perhaps? Only joking. But seriously, to me it was like looking at a beautifully taken photograph of rape. But you obviously know what you're doing. Ouch." -- the rube.
"Very nice, creative work. I probably would have hit that crazy ass women in the mouth though. " -- kwilt.
"Easily one of the best writers on this site." -- Sam T..
" As a woman, I was a bit unsure if I'd be able to like this story, but I have to say, I LOVED it! You really got into the mind of a female character and gave her power. I felt her hurt and rage, and I have to admit, I felt more than a mild satisfaction when she accoplished her task. The ending was a pretty interesting twist. It would have been just fine if she'd done what she set out to do, but you kept us guessing until we realize, as she does, just what happened. Just when I thought we were finished you yank us into suspense again. Very graphic, but not over-the-top, in my opinion. Kept me engaged and right with the action. I like your style, I am a King fan, and this was every bit as good. If you are not a proffessional writer, perhaps you should consider leaving your day job... Can't wait to check out more of your work!" -- Ann-Marie.


My Girl by Ann Herzer (1)
"Great story and I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the fine work.. Leave your impression!!" -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


Motor City by Kj Liddle (5)
"I like your descriptions, you can paint a pretty detailed picture. Other than that it wasn't too impressive...the narrating was a bit choppy and hard to read...I know they say to use short sentences, but i think u might have overdone it a little. As for content, the story doesn't have much of a purpose...the whole thing could have been told in about 100 words. Maybe u could add some sort of twist at the end, like you get to work and hear your boss say "hey KJ (or whatever your main character's name is,) well, as you know..." And maybe he has a cup of coffee in his hand when he says it...u know, have some fun with it, add some symbols. dont feel like u have to be so concrete and practical. " -- lee brooks.
"OoO! Nice site! I juuust LOVE it! Found it rather interesting and useful, you know:) http://www.phentermine.grandsearch.net" -- Phentermine, ..., ..., ....
"i wrote this for my creative comp class....i wasnt really worrying about the content and symbols i just needed to write a paper using the styles well...i really didnt have enough time to try to think of a good twist or anything, but if i did i would do like lee brooks said and added some clever things" -- Kj Liddle....the author.
"Ehmm..m. Sehr gut Seite! Ich sage innig..!:) bmw" -- BMW, ..., ..., ....
"pnwf ufjesz depctyohi idzt hfsapzxr qfticl sdgjvk" -- srdpb urftq, qxbawkped, CA, USA.


Losing The Sun by Riot (1)
"I really liked this. Beautifully written and it really got to me and got me thinking x" -- Briony Carvalho.


Heroin Trip 1 by Kendall Wilt (5)
"Hmm, took me a minute to get into it but the fast action pace certainly had me wanting more. Love the narrative style of it, so very different to your other things. I like this and want to see more. BTW I am not the only 'me' on this site so beware of imposters!" -- me.
"Would it be better if I just took out that heroin crap at the beggining? I wasn't really sure about that. Thanks for the goodies as well. Just trying to work this first person thing out. Great stuff up ahead." -- kswilt.
"I like the opening about heroin, makes you wonder how it's going to fit in the story. Reminiscent of the start of Shallow Grave. I'd leave it in, maybe as you develop add a couple of plot lines in like 'and how did heroin lead me halfway across the world' or whatever the main plot is. Love it! Can't wait for more!" -- me.
"well i finally broke down and read this and really glad i did. nicely told tale and the ineptness of this gang broke me up. hope there's more, can always use a good laugh. as for the heroin in the beginning, u may be right in thinking of removing that, it doesn't quite fit." -- curious.
"Great story bra, and keep up the writing. Find a publisher at www.writers-free-reference.com Also see my site for representation.. Laters" -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


Face-Off by Nur Syafiqah A Jaaffar (3)
"Oh my goodness! Syafiqah, your essay was so well-written! I can't believe it! Keep up with the good work! You are the one! Haha!" -- Venus, Singapore.
"WOW! ur essay is EXCELLENT! i hope i could write like you, but i suck at writing essays.LOL.XP" -- amira, Singapore.
"nice work for ayoungster" -- yudi, mumbai, ondia.


Crimson by Meghan L Bell (1)
"Great job and keep up the fine writing! Your awesome..." -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


Busback by Kendall Wilt (3)
"Kendall, nicely written. I love the conversational style and the way the facts are revealed. Perhaps Tinas name can be mentioned earlier as it is a little like she drops in to make the plot work. Otherwise, I love the style and felt this was compelling reading!" -- me.
"Great advice Me, I actually thought about doing that. I couldn't figure out how to do it and still keep the surprise like ending. I did through in the half bald tires part in the first line, so I was trying, but I trust your opinion so I will definatly work her in there somewhere sooner. Thank you so much for sticking with this story until it's completion. In a way,(because of your response), I wrote it for you." -- kwilt.
"Ah thanks Kendall (blush) glad you did such a good job of it! Reading it again I am struggling to see how to do it as well - maybe it should just stay how it is!" -- me.


At The Knife Point by G S Vasu Kumar G S Vasu Kumar (1)
"Story was predictable. Can be lot more better. Keep trying hard. Your thought process is fine." -- Alvin.


A Happy Death by Kain (1)
"Oh my, This was a great subject indeed. The first few lines trapped my eyes. The sarcastic humour kept my pace up. I just wanted to see how you were going to end it. Very pleased" -- Kwilt.


21st Street Tavern by Mark Casey (1)
"So true and been there done that.. ha Keep writing man you rock!" -- Matthew Mark@, USA.


There are 51 title entries with reviews on this page.


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